Thursday, November 19, 2015

Mama + Baby: Two Months of Telling It Like It Is


So we've made it to 2 months, and the journey has not been easy, but I'm glad we're here. The house is a dirty mess. I haven't swept in weeks. The kitchen stove looks like a messy day in a diner kitchen, but we're pretty happy and nearing a semblance of schedule that is heartening. I'm waiting for my first giggles, to be reached for when I come near, and more interactive play.

I found myself speculating at one point that I couldn't imagine my little man looking any different. It's almost like I could picture him before he was born, and this is the picture I saw. Of course I think I'm just projecting, but he feels like he belongs and always has. That makes the rough times easier to deal with, I think.

And boy are there some rough times. Days when my orders for my Etsy shops are piling up, and my to do list is huge, and I want to be independent and do it all, and he wants none of it. Will he sit idly by in his bouncy seat while I work? No siree... He wants feeding, and a diaper change for good measure, and some interaction, or to be held, or simply just to fuss and cry. And those are the days that are hardest for me, because I have to put aside what I want to be doing and my desire to be productive, and just give it up to be a nurturer.

And other days are magical, and we work in harmony and he is content to just be nearby, and he naps like a champ, and I get a lot done and it feels just like I imagined it would having a little one around.

I guess the gist of it is - it's all a mixed bag. Every day is a mystery, and learning to surrender to it is a tough thing for any independent, active person to do.


Luckily at this point we've gotten pretty good at breast feeding. I'm irrationally terrified of mastitis so that spices things up a bit... is my boob turning red? what was that pain? am I sleeping too far over on my side? It's a bit annoying to be so paranoid, but I am not sure I'd make it through a bout of mastitis and still come out breast feeding on the other side. So I try to be extra cautious and attentive.

I wanted to make this post a little more detailed and less philosophical, but it's late, and I'm tired, and my hot tea is running out, and there's nothing else I can think to say right now. I'm excited to see what the next month brings as we celebrate our first holidays together. I've already done a little Christmas shopping for our little fox... I'm just hoping I don't go too overboard, since I'm primarily indulging myself.

I'll leave you with this sneeze outtake from our 2 month photo session. Good night.


7 comments:

  1. When life gives you a hundred reasons to cry, show life that you have a thousand reasons to smile.
    Friv2Games, Kizi 6 Games, Yepi Games, Unblocked Craft, Friv, Y8Y8co, Y3 Game, Frozen Games, Y8Y8, Kizi, tetris battle, Friv, Y8Y8 co

    ReplyDelete
  2. While bosom bolstering, a mother needs around 500 additional calories daily. Sufficiently taking nourishment is a decent method to give your baby solid drain.How Many Crib Sheets Do I Need

    ReplyDelete
  3. AvriqPrinter RepairPrinter InstalltionWifi trouble shooting
    Software InstalltionI am looking to learn more about this issue. Thank you for sharing. I will follow this site regularly
    Virus removal

    ReplyDelete
  4. Not exclusively are you dressing to pull in potential customers yet you are likewise dressing to draw in individuals who may allude you to somebody they know. dress shoes for knee pain

    ReplyDelete

Blogging tips